When it comes to tolerance for risk, there are two types of people, and of the two I am, metaphorically, a window opener rather than a door knocker. As a window opener I need to see the desired outcome through the window, then I will …
A few years ago, I was on one of my flying visits back home to the UK (I’ve been expat-ing in the Middle East for a while, and a “supply run” was needed at intervals). A distant relative spotted me at a family gathering. We …
I am spending Saturday afternoon in the company of a property agent, showing me around apartments I’m looking to rent. It’s not how I’d choose to use my weekend, but if my current landlord isn’t renewing my lease because he wants to move into the …
My favourite food critic wrote a book which compiled the varied and strange last meal requests of death row prisoners. It makes me think of an alternative, less macabre, spin on the choice: if you could, from now on, only eat one meal, every day …
There’s something very accurate about the expression “calling it a day” when retiring to bed. It means you have to call it, you have to actively decide that enough is enough, the credits are rolling on the movie called My Day, and it is off …
I’m discussing guilty musical pleasures with a work colleague, when she screws her face up. I have just mentioned the group “Il Divo”. “I loved those guys. But I just can’t listen to them any more”, she sighs. She recounts the fateful day when she …
….So, where was I? Part One of this post became an elongated Trip Advisor review of (a) the airport taxi service (b) my hotel room, and (c) a traditional Turkish hammam. It seems I needed to get things off my chest. But now I come …
I arrive at Istanbul airport, travelling solo, with my slightly-too-big-for-just-one-weekend suitcase as a companion. Trying to be more locally authentic, I have booked a boutique, no-name hotel instead of the usual corporate, vanilla franchises. I decide not to take public transport from the airport because …
When the summer school hiatus hits, my family dutifully departs the Middle East to let their hair down in the UK, the US or both. The usual protocol for me is to join them for one or two stints over the summer. But, this year, …
Crossing over the border For several weeks now I have been traipsing through a new literary country. You see, earlier this year I dusted off a couple of books of my favourite poets and, feeling inspired to pen some of my own verse, decided to …
When it comes to dining out, few words stop me in my tracks quicker than “fusion”. For every one innovation in cuisine that fusion has served up into a culinary mainstay, there are fifty examples where it’s just misadventure masquerading as ingenuity. Often I can’t …
With Valentine’s Day approaching I am reminded of a contrarian comedian who once remarked that he doesn’t “do Valentine’s Day” because his expressions of love are not dictated by a random date on a calendar. I get that. Sure it’s a bit of fun for …
I have found a smart men’s salon on the other side of town. It’s a barbershop ++, that is, a full service salon with massages and the like. I happen to be in the area so I decide to pop in. It’s only my second …
This week, Prince William did the deed and unveiled to the world his new buzz cut. As a Royal, the only crown anyone had talked about was his thinning one. So, in a singular act of self-acceptance, he sheared away years of smoke and mirrors …
They say a little spontaneity goes a long way in a marriage. On an unremarkable Thursday evening, I’m about to put that theory to the test. In the Gulf country where I live as an expat, Friday and Saturday are the weekend. We’ve gotten into …
There are two things, amongst many others, which I consider unnatural. One is flying and the other is running. I don’t believe humans were designed to sit for hours on end in a pressurized aluminum tube at 35,000 feet, slowly ingesting hundreds of other people’s …
I am having dinner in an upmarket restaurant with my wife and her sister. This is my third time here and as with previous visits I notice that our bottle of water is never left on the table. The waiter pours and then retreats, bottle …
The family and I have just disembarked the hop-on, hop-off sightseeing bus that’s been wending its way down the Cape Town coastline. We make our way past a row of sea-front restaurants looking for a lunchtime snack. We’ve had a late and leisurely breakfast at …
I approach the man at the counter. “Three for “IT”, 3:45 showing, please”. My two teenage sons flank me, like youthful bodyguards. We are buying tickets for a newly released horror film based on the Stephen King novel about a demonic clown. I know that …
I’m in Ontario on holiday at my brother’s house. For one week, I have exchanged the blistering summer heat of the Middle East – where I’ve lived for the last five years – for a more civilized Canadian summer. I am finishing off the last …
I am sitting with work colleagues at a Turkish restaurant. It’s a team evening out. I endorsed the choice of venue although it’s my first time here. It’s not a well-known eatery but is there anything better than discovering a hidden gem? There were no …
“Weekends don’t count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless” – Bill Watterson I was interviewed for a personal profile piece in a legal recruiter’s newsletter a few years back. When asked what I did in my spare time, like on weekends, I replied, …
As with Italian food, it is only later in life that I have come to appreciate the virtues of the rodent-venerating theme park. As a teenager I first visited the Magic Kingdom in California and as a young father it’s counterpart in Florida. I treated …
“Empathy is…the capacity to understand…that someone else’s pain is as meaningful as your own.” Barbara Kingsolver I’m plugged into my laptop, watching one of those comedy specials that Netflix seems to throw out weekly. The stand-up takes aim at the expense of some tragic historical …
“The greatest burden a child must bear is the unlived life of its parents” Carl Jung I am congratulating myself on becoming an enlightened parent, by deciding that I won’t claim to be their Custodian of Correct Career Choices. Of course, (most) parents want their children …
I climb out of bed and head to the living room. Silence. The family are already up and settled: earphones inserted, curled up separately, clasping their personal rectangles and gazing intently downwards, smirking or just staring. A quick glance upwards from one of them cursorily …
“The description “airport novel” is mildly pejorative; it implies that the book has little lasting value, and is useful chiefly as an inexpensive form of entertainment during travel.” Wikipedia There’s something about sitting at an airport, waiting for a flight, that puts me in a …
I wouldn’t even call my Facebook page a Facepamplet page. For a start, there are no faces on it. I joined at my younger brother’s suggestion (come join the 21st Century bro!) but, having poured the soil into the window box, I never went on …
“Remembrance of things past is not necessarily the remembrance of things as they were.” ― Marcel Proust I’m at Madison Square Garden, NYC, watching U2. Despite being seated in nosebleed territory I have parted with some substantial coinage to be here, having bought from an …
Last summer I visited New York City for the first time. Accompanied by family, newly energized, and armed with selfie stick, newly unboxed, we hit the Big Apple (without a care as to what that random fruit-inspired label meant, although admittedly “we hit the Large …
“What day is it?” “It’s today,” squeaked Piglet. “My favorite day,” said Pooh.” ― A.A. Milne I was reading online an article posted by a 46-year old banker in the UK who discovered that his wife of many years had been unfaithful. This led him …
“You should always be taking pictures, if not with a camera then with your mind. Memories you capture on purpose are always more vivid than the ones you pick up by accident.” ― Isaac Marion, Warm Bodies Recently my younger brother sent me a picture …
There’s a moment in the 2010 film Due Date, when the odd couple on a comedy road trip stand in the lobby of a motel as they realize they don’t have enough money to stay there. As they leave the building, one of them runs …
